Intent to Change

I wrote a memo to myself,
To describe who I should be.
I lost the memo in transit,
To the places I should see.
The starlit dinners,
And the tequila sunrises.
The heart-dropping girl,
With the pretty hair.
The years passed,
And so did she.
Came and went,
From sea to sea.
The names, they passed,
Like words in rhymes.
The shades of grey,
The gentle signs.
The changes there,
Within our minds.
The phases there,
Within our minds.
I once saw the world,
From the lens of self.
But I cast it out,
Disgusted by the clarity of single vision.
Now fractured,
Skewed,
Superglued,
And confounded.
I see not single, doubly, or even triply.
I see compound thoughts of colored faces.
Hopes, and loves, and hate of races.
Good and bad,
The inbetween.
The grey, the black,
The Red and Green.
And so time passed,
And so did I.
The heart break girl,
With the pretty eyes.
She came and went,
Or so it seems.
But I still see her in my dreams.
I lost that memo on a whim,
But did not know what pain began.
The growth, and change, and fluctuations.
To create this humbled,
This foolish station.
But what’s more foolish,
Then to be,
Loved, or not to be.